Worship Wednesday - Weary One
I've known weariness this past year. I wish it was from working out too much or from wearing myself thin with ministry work. Those are a different kind of weariness which I've often worn and even enjoyed. However, I'm speaking of a more difficult journey. It's the weariness of facing the unknown day after day, of not knowing where the next paycheck will come from, how medical bills will be covered, whether a marriage will work out, what will happen to the kids, does anyone even care about me, why do I feel so alone, will this season ever end? Often I'd go weeks without noticing it. Maybe I got used to it, like breathing the thinner air of the mountains. But of course, I never really got used to it.
I remember the first time I realized just how bad it had gotten. It was just a few months ago when I officially received the offer letter for my new job. It was like taking a deep breath for the first time in a year. I hadn't known how constricted my whole body had gotten, tense from wondering about the future. What a relief to check off just one of the many things on my "waiting to be answered" prayer list. I was a hunch-back who was finally able to stand up straight. I was a parent at Disney World, finally setting down a child that had ridden on my shoulders all the way back to car at the end of the day.
Does this mean my faith was lacking? Surely if I trusted God more I wouldn't have felt such a burden.
I don't think my faith was lacking. I know it wasn't. I firmly believed that God would take care of me. But that doesn't mean I didn't feel the weight of all the realities of living in a fallen world. Surely you feel it too. Does feeling the weight of millions of deaths through abortion mean you have little faith? Does your concern for a wayward child, spouse, or sibling mean you aren't trusting God? Of course not. Faith is a characteristic that is grown through the weariness. Didn't Jesus Himself say, "Come to me, all you who are weary, and I will give you rest." (Mt. 11:28) He didn't say, "Fix your weariness, then come talk to me." Paul writes, "The whole creation is groaning together... and not only the creation, but we ourselves." (Rom. 8:22-23) The weight of the broken world affects everything and causes us to ache for something better.
Can you imagine the relief that we will feel once we are with Jesus! As I wrote earlier, there are things that wearify (yes, that's a new word... just go with it) us which we don't even realize. Things that burden us down simply because we are a part of this world. But one day, one day we will find relief.
That brings me to this amazing song. Brittany Kauflin wrote a whole album of songs for people like you and me, broken people looking for hope. I commend the whole album to you, and you'll be hearing another shout out later this year.
This song in particular ministered to my soul. The imagery of the toil in front and behind, the fainting heart losing its identity, the grieving and torn soul. Just reading it brings tears to my eyes as I think back my experiences of each of those things and how listening to this song brought me back to focusing on the Christ. The gentle music and poetic message call us to a simple action- come. Jesus brings relief. He brings rest.
I know this because I've experienced it. I do sing again, in my soul and with my voice. But most importantly, I know this because God promised it. His Word is a relief because it points me to Him. That is why I can sing, even through the weariness. And I can't wait until ultimate relief finally comes.
“Come, everyone who thirsts, come to the waters;
and he who has no money, come, buy and eat!
Why do you spend your money for that which is not bread,
and your labor for that which does not satisfy?
Listen diligently to me, and eat what is good,
and delight yourselves in rich food...
Seek the Lord while he may be found;
call upon him while he is near;
For as the rain and the snow come down from heaven
and do not return there but water the earth,
making it bring forth and sprout,
giving seed to the sower and bread to the eater,
so shall my word be that goes out from my mouth..."
- from Isaiah 55 -
Brittany Hope Kauflin
Chased by another fading sun,
Faced by the toil to be done,
Why don’t you come?
Losing the soul of who you are,
Searching for peace that feels so far,
Come as you are.
Come to the waters, thirsty and weak;
Come to the Savior, sit down and eat;
Drink from His mercy, take of His love;
He is enough.
Whose heart is torn and will not mend
And you just can’t seem to reach the end,
You’ll sing again.
Drink up, rest deep;
He knows, He sees.
Find hope, find peace;
Look up, be free.